Editor's Note
It is the end of 2014 and although Thanksgiving is over, there is one thing I would like to share with you. Every summer I have been invited to share and perform in anartists conference. This year I invited another professional dancer in Christ to dance a duet with me. Because all programs in the afternoon were delayed, the Program Director decided -an hour before the evening gathering- to shorten the sermon, my sharing time and all performances (including our duet). Our dance piece could not be changed, because the music and choreography had been set so only the sharing could be cut short. I was really upset because a similar situation occurs every year. Why could they not implement the program on time? I complained to God, but also submitted to the director’s decision, and prayed to God to give me peace of mind. I went to the teachers’ lounge to eat and came across the founder of the conference. He asked me what was going on as he had heard that my program was to be cut short. I did not talk to him much. I just told him that over the years I have never exceeded the time given to me for sharing and performance and never disrupted other people's time; but because of people’s mistakes that afternoon, the evening program was affected. Then I returned to the theater. When I was standing in the back to watch the opening show, the Program Director said to me, “Ginny, you can present your whole sharing & dance.” I was speechless, and full of gratitude; God really loves me! That evening, my program was the only one that was not shortened. God's omniscience and control really amazed me.
In this issue, several brothers share their thoughts and several sisters share their thanksgivings. Mrs Chang obtained her driving license; Pauline found the GCCC family; Laurie's ear problem was resolved by a hearing aid and she could get back to normal life in the church; Mrs. Hu’s back pain started to get better because of her prayer. Yikuan shares her hardship looking for an apartment and the wonderful leading of God. Jane shares how she experienced God's blessings through her pain and suffering. Kong’s letter to Brother Richard Leung is full of grace and peace in Christ. Philip contemplates how we can respond to God’s love as we commemorate the Lord’s Supper. Ginny shares about how change starts from a right conviction. Michael continues to write about Psalm 23: 2. Frail Soul concludes the Heaven/Hell Divorce Case. Thank God that multiple authors write and share in this issue. I hope many of you will continue to contribute, so that God’s work will be manifest in our articles.
In this issue, several brothers share their thoughts and several sisters share their thanksgivings. Mrs Chang obtained her driving license; Pauline found the GCCC family; Laurie's ear problem was resolved by a hearing aid and she could get back to normal life in the church; Mrs. Hu’s back pain started to get better because of her prayer. Yikuan shares her hardship looking for an apartment and the wonderful leading of God. Jane shares how she experienced God's blessings through her pain and suffering. Kong’s letter to Brother Richard Leung is full of grace and peace in Christ. Philip contemplates how we can respond to God’s love as we commemorate the Lord’s Supper. Ginny shares about how change starts from a right conviction. Michael continues to write about Psalm 23: 2. Frail Soul concludes the Heaven/Hell Divorce Case. Thank God that multiple authors write and share in this issue. I hope many of you will continue to contribute, so that God’s work will be manifest in our articles.
Heaven and Hell Divorce Case (7)
Author: Frail Soul
Guo and Tianchang tried to find a way out.
"Brother, it seems there is no way out." Guo asked.
Tianchang said, "Really?"
They both stared at the book, hoping to see words appear and give hints to get out of the city of refuge.
The book just showed the same words:
"Lamp unto my feet and light unto my path; what does that mean?" Tianchang was contemplating.
Guo said, "I think it means that the words of the master of heaven will lead the way in front of us."
"It is too abstract, and I do not understand. What we need is to find a way to leave this cave," Tianchang answered.
"It is not the best to just get out; if the messengers of Hell grab us, that would be even worse," Guo continued, "We worked so hard to escape with our lives from the hall; if we get out now, we will be like sheep slaughtered by the tiger. We will be killed or tortured by the messengers of hell. Even if we fought our way back to the hall, I do not know if there will be boat ride to heaven. I think it is better not to get out."
Tianchang sighed and said, "Yes, I would rather be a free man and not see the daylight than be on death row under daylight.”
"Brother, you now speak rationally; incredibly, you have changed." Guo said with a smile.
Tianchang laughed triumphantly, "In the past I have heard people say that Jesus can change everything! I think a little bit of change is pretty good, but I really don’t think I can stand changing from head to toe!"
Guo agreed with Tianchang and nodded. Some new words appeared on the book, "If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come."
When the two people finished reading these words, they shouted in unison, "A new creation!"
Suddenly, a great light appeared; it was so bright that they could not open their eyes, and the sky and earth seemed to be spinning ...
Guo heard himself shouting, "Tianchang, Tianchang…. "
The alarm clock rang, interrupting all Guo’s recall of what happened in the dream. He got ready to go to work, but his mind desperately wanted to find out exactly what would happen to him and Tianchang in the end.
After many months, Guo still would like to resume this unfinished dream. Even though life was normal, but his heart still had this tight knot. After nightmares, many would be afraid to have the same dreams. But Guo hoped to continue this unfinished dream. When he occasionally heard people mention the word divorce, he would naturally think of this dream: it is impossible to join together heaven and hell, and so how can they get a divorce? One must choose between the two. He began to pursue this paradise boat in his dream.
That Christmas Eve, he summoned his courage and stepped into a church and quietly sat in a corner. Someone asked him, "Friend, do you need a Bible?" Guolooked up. Wasn’t he Tianchang, the usher that stood in front of him, holding the Bible?
"Tianchang!" Guo called out and stood up excitedly.
"How do you know my name? I do not have my name-tag today." Tianchang said with a smile to Guo and handed him a Bible.
Guo told him, "We know each other and I want to talk to you."
"Good, I will chat with you after the meeting. I am happy to meet you. What's your name?"
"Guo," replied Guo. At that moment, the knot finally got untied after many months. He no longer had to think about that unfinished dream.
The End
“There’s no good saying you choose to lie down when it has become impossible to stand up. That won’t be the time for choosing: it will be the time when we discover which side we really have chosen, whether we realized it before or not. Now is our chance to choose the right side. God is holding back to give us that chance. It won’t last forever. We must take it or leave it.”
C.S.Lewis - The Case For Christianity
Guo and Tianchang tried to find a way out.
"Brother, it seems there is no way out." Guo asked.
Tianchang said, "Really?"
They both stared at the book, hoping to see words appear and give hints to get out of the city of refuge.
The book just showed the same words:
"Lamp unto my feet and light unto my path; what does that mean?" Tianchang was contemplating.
Guo said, "I think it means that the words of the master of heaven will lead the way in front of us."
"It is too abstract, and I do not understand. What we need is to find a way to leave this cave," Tianchang answered.
"It is not the best to just get out; if the messengers of Hell grab us, that would be even worse," Guo continued, "We worked so hard to escape with our lives from the hall; if we get out now, we will be like sheep slaughtered by the tiger. We will be killed or tortured by the messengers of hell. Even if we fought our way back to the hall, I do not know if there will be boat ride to heaven. I think it is better not to get out."
Tianchang sighed and said, "Yes, I would rather be a free man and not see the daylight than be on death row under daylight.”
"Brother, you now speak rationally; incredibly, you have changed." Guo said with a smile.
Tianchang laughed triumphantly, "In the past I have heard people say that Jesus can change everything! I think a little bit of change is pretty good, but I really don’t think I can stand changing from head to toe!"
Guo agreed with Tianchang and nodded. Some new words appeared on the book, "If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come."
When the two people finished reading these words, they shouted in unison, "A new creation!"
Suddenly, a great light appeared; it was so bright that they could not open their eyes, and the sky and earth seemed to be spinning ...
Guo heard himself shouting, "Tianchang, Tianchang…. "
The alarm clock rang, interrupting all Guo’s recall of what happened in the dream. He got ready to go to work, but his mind desperately wanted to find out exactly what would happen to him and Tianchang in the end.
After many months, Guo still would like to resume this unfinished dream. Even though life was normal, but his heart still had this tight knot. After nightmares, many would be afraid to have the same dreams. But Guo hoped to continue this unfinished dream. When he occasionally heard people mention the word divorce, he would naturally think of this dream: it is impossible to join together heaven and hell, and so how can they get a divorce? One must choose between the two. He began to pursue this paradise boat in his dream.
That Christmas Eve, he summoned his courage and stepped into a church and quietly sat in a corner. Someone asked him, "Friend, do you need a Bible?" Guolooked up. Wasn’t he Tianchang, the usher that stood in front of him, holding the Bible?
"Tianchang!" Guo called out and stood up excitedly.
"How do you know my name? I do not have my name-tag today." Tianchang said with a smile to Guo and handed him a Bible.
Guo told him, "We know each other and I want to talk to you."
"Good, I will chat with you after the meeting. I am happy to meet you. What's your name?"
"Guo," replied Guo. At that moment, the knot finally got untied after many months. He no longer had to think about that unfinished dream.
The End
“There’s no good saying you choose to lie down when it has become impossible to stand up. That won’t be the time for choosing: it will be the time when we discover which side we really have chosen, whether we realized it before or not. Now is our chance to choose the right side. God is holding back to give us that chance. It won’t last forever. We must take it or leave it.”
C.S.Lewis - The Case For Christianity
Thanksgiving
Author: Mrs. Chang
Our dear Lord is the Lord that loves each one of us; great is His faithfulness, His love endures forever. He knows our needs, but He also has his timing to prepare and arrange for us; this is my personal experience. I am very grateful to GCCC brothers and sisters, who help me and care for me with love like family members. With the driver's license test I received help from Mr. and Mrs. Zane, Mr. and Mrs. Ouyang, and Mrs. Choi, who took time out of their busy schedules to help me. I was moved to tears, and I could only pray that the Lord would bless them in return. During the driver's license test, I thought of the Bible's promises recorded in Isaiah 41:10: "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Also in John 14:13-14 the Lord told us:" And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father. You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.” The word of God is faithful; it helps me to have more confidence to move forward. Again thanks be to God and to brothers and sisters for their love, help and care for me. Glory be to God.
Our dear Lord is the Lord that loves each one of us; great is His faithfulness, His love endures forever. He knows our needs, but He also has his timing to prepare and arrange for us; this is my personal experience. I am very grateful to GCCC brothers and sisters, who help me and care for me with love like family members. With the driver's license test I received help from Mr. and Mrs. Zane, Mr. and Mrs. Ouyang, and Mrs. Choi, who took time out of their busy schedules to help me. I was moved to tears, and I could only pray that the Lord would bless them in return. During the driver's license test, I thought of the Bible's promises recorded in Isaiah 41:10: "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Also in John 14:13-14 the Lord told us:" And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father. You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.” The word of God is faithful; it helps me to have more confidence to move forward. Again thanks be to God and to brothers and sisters for their love, help and care for me. Glory be to God.
A Letter to Brother Richard Leung
Author: Kong
Preface: Our church started a series of Sunday sermons on the book of Ephesians this April. Pastor Benjamin Tam began preaching on the first few verses of Chapter one. On October 16th he preached again in our church on the last few verses of Chapter six. He asked us: "What do Christians desire? Is it health?” This is right from our hearts. But he said, " Christians should desire God-given grace and peace." The Apostle Paul wrote to many churches and he greeted other believers: “Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.”
I think health is our desire. However, with the grace and peace from God, we have everything.
Then I thought, “What is grace?” It is a blessing from God; we are unworthy to receive the blessings from God, the redemption of Christ, all the benefits and goodness of God.
And I thought, “What is peace?” It is based on a reconciled relationship with God, a healthy and stable mind, a positive self-image; we can take it easy with people and things. We can have God given peace of mind.
Brother Leung, based on my understanding of you and Su Ling, and recollection of a few short conversations, I write this letter. Please excuse me if I have errors, misunderstanding and deficiencies in writing this letter.
--------
Nothing that happens in the family of God is accidental. I was glad to have the opportunity of getting to know you and Su Ling. I knew you attended the CCUC church for many years before coming to GCCC. Therefore you both knew very well about church matters.
I recalled on a Sunday this March, when the weather in Chicago area was getting warmer and we were in the church lobby waiting to get into the worship center.
“Su Ling, how are you today? How do you feel?”
“I feel quite good, my blood sugar is sometimes a bit low; I always have candies ready in case I need them.”
“We learnt a verse last week; shall we read it together?”
“Sure. A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” (Proverbs 17:22).
Time passed really quickly. In August, Chinatown held a Summer Fest. Most of the major roads were blocked for vehicle travel. The streets were full of tourists and people. It was really bustling.
In the vicinity in a hospital room, you accompanied Su Ling and waited for her specialist’s diagnosis and treatment. This was an excellent room, facing west with a panoramic view. The sunlight beamed on you both through the blinds. You talked about Su Ling’s situation before and after being admitted to the hospital. Su Ling also talked about her illness and her condition: the doctor had done whatever they could. During the conversation, she stretched out her hands and smiled, “Other than this illness, I still have energy to deal with my daily chores, and a good appetite, and the ability to talk with a strong voice.“
The setting sun shone on her face; the eyes, the eyebrows, the nose, the lips; it was indeed a very beautiful face, harmonized with her peacefulness. There was no contention, but for whatever was ahead there was a calmness beyond the earthly realm. Ah! This was what God had given to her: a calm and peaceful state of mind.
I came to understand; her worldly body would deteriorate, her health would be lost, but the most important thing was that God's grace and peace were with her.
I thought about what her situation would become. Her body would change. I thought of what Billy Graham said that was quite comforting and helpful for many people. He said: "God gives everyone a soul, this soul is with that person all the time, they are side by side with each other. When the body needs to go, the soul needs to return to God, the giver of the soul. With the separation of these two, something unusual will happen: this heart will have pain, this face will change, and this physical body will decay. These will happen; however, they will pass. God understands our situation; God will wipe away our tears. What we need is to seek Him, and He will give us peace and comfort.”
I also thought of Ecclesiastes chapter 9. During Su Ling’s lifetime given by God, she enjoyed her life with her beloved husband. This was God’s blessing. As she lost her health, the world’s richness and vanity had no meaning to her. It may look like she had nothing, but indeed she had abundant blessing and she had her husband from her youth staying with her in this much-needed time. She got a very well-equipped hospital room and she received attentive care from health professionals. These were all God’s mercy with her. She indeed got the most valuable gift of all.
When I am writing this, I think of how you will walk this future path. May God guide and lead you. What I am trying to say is that our souls seem to have a lot of boxes of different sizes. In these boxes, we put all sorts of different things. One is for our grandparents’ things, one our parents’ things, one our husbands/wives’ things, one our children’s things, one our relatives’ things, one our love, and so on. What If one of the most precious boxes is suddenly empty? What can we do? How can we fill up the loss? Through time? Caring? Tears? Work? Traveling? Music or other ways to replace what we have lost? All are helpful, but the best replacement for this empty box is God’s word and praise songs, because in Christ there is the richness of God’s grace. This grace will slowly refill this empty box. Thank God that you are doing this now. May God's grace and peace be with you and your family.
Your brother in Christ: Kong Yu 11/16/2014
Preface: Our church started a series of Sunday sermons on the book of Ephesians this April. Pastor Benjamin Tam began preaching on the first few verses of Chapter one. On October 16th he preached again in our church on the last few verses of Chapter six. He asked us: "What do Christians desire? Is it health?” This is right from our hearts. But he said, " Christians should desire God-given grace and peace." The Apostle Paul wrote to many churches and he greeted other believers: “Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.”
I think health is our desire. However, with the grace and peace from God, we have everything.
Then I thought, “What is grace?” It is a blessing from God; we are unworthy to receive the blessings from God, the redemption of Christ, all the benefits and goodness of God.
And I thought, “What is peace?” It is based on a reconciled relationship with God, a healthy and stable mind, a positive self-image; we can take it easy with people and things. We can have God given peace of mind.
Brother Leung, based on my understanding of you and Su Ling, and recollection of a few short conversations, I write this letter. Please excuse me if I have errors, misunderstanding and deficiencies in writing this letter.
--------
Nothing that happens in the family of God is accidental. I was glad to have the opportunity of getting to know you and Su Ling. I knew you attended the CCUC church for many years before coming to GCCC. Therefore you both knew very well about church matters.
I recalled on a Sunday this March, when the weather in Chicago area was getting warmer and we were in the church lobby waiting to get into the worship center.
“Su Ling, how are you today? How do you feel?”
“I feel quite good, my blood sugar is sometimes a bit low; I always have candies ready in case I need them.”
“We learnt a verse last week; shall we read it together?”
“Sure. A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” (Proverbs 17:22).
Time passed really quickly. In August, Chinatown held a Summer Fest. Most of the major roads were blocked for vehicle travel. The streets were full of tourists and people. It was really bustling.
In the vicinity in a hospital room, you accompanied Su Ling and waited for her specialist’s diagnosis and treatment. This was an excellent room, facing west with a panoramic view. The sunlight beamed on you both through the blinds. You talked about Su Ling’s situation before and after being admitted to the hospital. Su Ling also talked about her illness and her condition: the doctor had done whatever they could. During the conversation, she stretched out her hands and smiled, “Other than this illness, I still have energy to deal with my daily chores, and a good appetite, and the ability to talk with a strong voice.“
The setting sun shone on her face; the eyes, the eyebrows, the nose, the lips; it was indeed a very beautiful face, harmonized with her peacefulness. There was no contention, but for whatever was ahead there was a calmness beyond the earthly realm. Ah! This was what God had given to her: a calm and peaceful state of mind.
I came to understand; her worldly body would deteriorate, her health would be lost, but the most important thing was that God's grace and peace were with her.
I thought about what her situation would become. Her body would change. I thought of what Billy Graham said that was quite comforting and helpful for many people. He said: "God gives everyone a soul, this soul is with that person all the time, they are side by side with each other. When the body needs to go, the soul needs to return to God, the giver of the soul. With the separation of these two, something unusual will happen: this heart will have pain, this face will change, and this physical body will decay. These will happen; however, they will pass. God understands our situation; God will wipe away our tears. What we need is to seek Him, and He will give us peace and comfort.”
I also thought of Ecclesiastes chapter 9. During Su Ling’s lifetime given by God, she enjoyed her life with her beloved husband. This was God’s blessing. As she lost her health, the world’s richness and vanity had no meaning to her. It may look like she had nothing, but indeed she had abundant blessing and she had her husband from her youth staying with her in this much-needed time. She got a very well-equipped hospital room and she received attentive care from health professionals. These were all God’s mercy with her. She indeed got the most valuable gift of all.
When I am writing this, I think of how you will walk this future path. May God guide and lead you. What I am trying to say is that our souls seem to have a lot of boxes of different sizes. In these boxes, we put all sorts of different things. One is for our grandparents’ things, one our parents’ things, one our husbands/wives’ things, one our children’s things, one our relatives’ things, one our love, and so on. What If one of the most precious boxes is suddenly empty? What can we do? How can we fill up the loss? Through time? Caring? Tears? Work? Traveling? Music or other ways to replace what we have lost? All are helpful, but the best replacement for this empty box is God’s word and praise songs, because in Christ there is the richness of God’s grace. This grace will slowly refill this empty box. Thank God that you are doing this now. May God's grace and peace be with you and your family.
Your brother in Christ: Kong Yu 11/16/2014
Psalm 23:2, My Thoughts and Q&A
Author: Michael 11/6/2014
(Personal devotion sharing, for reference only.)
He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the quiet waters.
1. Q: Who is He? Verse 1 mentioned the Creator’s name, but also mentioned shepherd as a metaphor.
So is “He” in here referring to His role as shepherd or the Creator?
A: Literally, the “He” in here continues the metaphor of the shepherd, who brings the sheep to places for food and drink. However, to think deeper, you will find the role of the Creator. Who made the earth? The grass? The sheep? Who leads the sheep in grazing? In Genesis, the Lord let the water recede, to form land and let the grass grow. And then the sheep were created, so the sheep could eat the grass and have land to stay. The "He" has the Creator’s power and infinite wisdom, and the shepherd’s personal care and guidance.
2. Q: Do you see a few things that the sheep likes in this verse?
A: There are green pastures, beside quiet waters; there is grass for the sheep to eat and it is delicious grass (according to the Hebrew text). There are green pastures, plentiful for food, but also a soft bed for sleep and rest. There is water to drink and a place to rest beside the quiet waters. So we can deduce that there is warm sunshine with no pollution or haze.
Also, do not forget there is plenty of space for movement, "He leads me.” I can either walk, or rest, the kind of freedom that cannot be provided in a sheep pen.
3. Q: Why say beside quiet water? Are waters that we won’t be beside?
A: I've been to some places before where the river is dirty and smelly, the tap water has color, tastes salty, and smells earthy or stingy. Many places have hazy air.
Therefore, polluted areas are not fit to rest beside the quiet waters.
4. Q: The Bible put resting and water together, what is the background?
A: The root of “resting” נוח is equivalent to נח Noah. This indicates that we should refer to the story of Noah and the flood. We cannot rest beside the floodwater. The flood basically occurred because of disharmony between the created and the creator.
Genesis 8:9 also mentions resting and water together, but says the dove could not rest its feet because there was water over all the surface of the earth. (Chinese: a place to set its feet, ( מנוח
The sheep’s ancestors were squeezed in a small space inside the dark ark eating hay a few months old. Only when the created and the creator restore their relationship, can there be rest beside quiet waters.
The "I" in the Psalm rests beside the quiet waters, as the created creature enjoying the harmonious relationship with the Creator; as sheep enjoying the harmony with the shepherd.
5.Q: Why does it say in here only lying and resting, and not mention work and responsibility?
A: In the book of Genesis, man was assigned to be the gardener. Did any job get assigned to the sheep? The sheep did not need to work. Their hair only needed to be shaved by the shepherd regularly. They followed the shepherd, ate and drank, slept and walked, gave birth to baby sheep. As long as the sheep listened, they completed their task.
6. Q: If this "He" in here is considered to be the Creator, then what is His relationship with "resting"?
A: This is an important relationship. Psalm 23 is read twice on every Jewish Sabbath Day.
The Creator is the Lord of the Sabbath or rest. Exodus 20:11 said he made everything in six days and rested on the seventh day. This Sabbath day is set aside.
Deuteronomy 5:14,15 also mentioned that the livestock has the freedom to rest. Rest is His command in the Ten Commandments and only He can give us a real rest.
(Personal devotion sharing, for reference only.)
He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the quiet waters.
1. Q: Who is He? Verse 1 mentioned the Creator’s name, but also mentioned shepherd as a metaphor.
So is “He” in here referring to His role as shepherd or the Creator?
A: Literally, the “He” in here continues the metaphor of the shepherd, who brings the sheep to places for food and drink. However, to think deeper, you will find the role of the Creator. Who made the earth? The grass? The sheep? Who leads the sheep in grazing? In Genesis, the Lord let the water recede, to form land and let the grass grow. And then the sheep were created, so the sheep could eat the grass and have land to stay. The "He" has the Creator’s power and infinite wisdom, and the shepherd’s personal care and guidance.
2. Q: Do you see a few things that the sheep likes in this verse?
A: There are green pastures, beside quiet waters; there is grass for the sheep to eat and it is delicious grass (according to the Hebrew text). There are green pastures, plentiful for food, but also a soft bed for sleep and rest. There is water to drink and a place to rest beside the quiet waters. So we can deduce that there is warm sunshine with no pollution or haze.
Also, do not forget there is plenty of space for movement, "He leads me.” I can either walk, or rest, the kind of freedom that cannot be provided in a sheep pen.
3. Q: Why say beside quiet water? Are waters that we won’t be beside?
A: I've been to some places before where the river is dirty and smelly, the tap water has color, tastes salty, and smells earthy or stingy. Many places have hazy air.
Therefore, polluted areas are not fit to rest beside the quiet waters.
4. Q: The Bible put resting and water together, what is the background?
A: The root of “resting” נוח is equivalent to נח Noah. This indicates that we should refer to the story of Noah and the flood. We cannot rest beside the floodwater. The flood basically occurred because of disharmony between the created and the creator.
Genesis 8:9 also mentions resting and water together, but says the dove could not rest its feet because there was water over all the surface of the earth. (Chinese: a place to set its feet, ( מנוח
The sheep’s ancestors were squeezed in a small space inside the dark ark eating hay a few months old. Only when the created and the creator restore their relationship, can there be rest beside quiet waters.
The "I" in the Psalm rests beside the quiet waters, as the created creature enjoying the harmonious relationship with the Creator; as sheep enjoying the harmony with the shepherd.
5.Q: Why does it say in here only lying and resting, and not mention work and responsibility?
A: In the book of Genesis, man was assigned to be the gardener. Did any job get assigned to the sheep? The sheep did not need to work. Their hair only needed to be shaved by the shepherd regularly. They followed the shepherd, ate and drank, slept and walked, gave birth to baby sheep. As long as the sheep listened, they completed their task.
6. Q: If this "He" in here is considered to be the Creator, then what is His relationship with "resting"?
A: This is an important relationship. Psalm 23 is read twice on every Jewish Sabbath Day.
The Creator is the Lord of the Sabbath or rest. Exodus 20:11 said he made everything in six days and rested on the seventh day. This Sabbath day is set aside.
Deuteronomy 5:14,15 also mentioned that the livestock has the freedom to rest. Rest is His command in the Ten Commandments and only He can give us a real rest.
My Feelings towards GCCC
Author: Pauline
Three years ago, my eldest son and his family of three came to Chicago to visit us two old folks. Because they are devout Christians, I hoped to find a church in my neighborhood so they could go to Sunday services nearby. Thank the Lord, after looking for more than a month without success, and becoming quite anxious, I received an email from my son with the address of GCCC. So we decided to come to this church.
Although it was our first visit to GCCC, it felt warm like home. Warm greetings and the caring of church members impressed us. Even more surprising was that I met Laurie who had worked with me seven years ago at the school canteen.
My son stayed for about two weeks and then went back to Hong Kong. I continued to attend GCCC to hear the pastor’s preaching of the truth of the Bible, the Lord's words, and learn how to pray. It is most unfortunate that my husband is still hard hearted. He does not want to worship with me in church or listen to the pastors preaching of the truth of the Bible. I am very grateful that I am able to worship at GCCC today; in fact, it is really the Lord’s arrangement. I hope one day my husband can come with me to GCCC, to know Him and to become His servant. May the Lord’s name be glorified.
Three years ago, my eldest son and his family of three came to Chicago to visit us two old folks. Because they are devout Christians, I hoped to find a church in my neighborhood so they could go to Sunday services nearby. Thank the Lord, after looking for more than a month without success, and becoming quite anxious, I received an email from my son with the address of GCCC. So we decided to come to this church.
Although it was our first visit to GCCC, it felt warm like home. Warm greetings and the caring of church members impressed us. Even more surprising was that I met Laurie who had worked with me seven years ago at the school canteen.
My son stayed for about two weeks and then went back to Hong Kong. I continued to attend GCCC to hear the pastor’s preaching of the truth of the Bible, the Lord's words, and learn how to pray. It is most unfortunate that my husband is still hard hearted. He does not want to worship with me in church or listen to the pastors preaching of the truth of the Bible. I am very grateful that I am able to worship at GCCC today; in fact, it is really the Lord’s arrangement. I hope one day my husband can come with me to GCCC, to know Him and to become His servant. May the Lord’s name be glorified.
Live out a conviction
Author: Ginny
This summer I had already scheduled my October and December trips to China. However, I had struggled about these 2 trips. Our evangelistic performances moved to Guangzhou this year so we needed to recruit a new performing troupe. Although our operation was the same as last year, the troupe would be brand new; only one couple from my previous troupe would come to work with me. I was reluctant to go because my older son had gone to college and my younger son would be at home alone. I was anxious to leave him for over three weeks per trip and I did not want to leave my family for too long.
I heard from my co-worker in China that they had some difficulty recruiting new performers this time, so we might not be able to run our performing tour this year. Although I had prayed about this concern, I had no great desire that God would accomplish this. I thought if we could not open the performance-training course, then I did not need to go. Two weeks later, the co-worker told me God had prepared more than fifteen brothers and sisters to join this performance training. When I heard this great news, my heart had mixed feelings. On the one hand I was thankful that God listened to our prayers, but on the other hand, I was not well prepared to go. Then two weeks before my departure, I received an email from my co-worker that the troupe was being investigated by the officials. In the following few days, the police came to check and took lots of pictures of our site. The landlord started to question my co-worker about what was going on. We all prayed about this and entrusted it to God’s guidance. After the co-workers both here and in China had a conference on Skype, we unanimously decided to cancel this year’s evangelistic performances.
My heart was relieved, although I felt a bit of regret and was unable to experience "God’s Dance" like last year. I knew all these are from Him; the Psalm says, " O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord." (Psalm 139: 1-4). I knew deep in my heart I did not have the same passion towards the evangelistic performance ministry as before. I did not know when the drive that once prompted me to give up everything and devote all my time-without counting the cost to dive in this ministry-quietly slipped away. Perhaps because we moved to a new location again. In the four years while I was there, we had moved four times in the vicinity of Shanghai. We also stayed in Sichuan for a short while. Then in the 5th and the 6th year we settled in Wuxi. This seventh year we moved to Guangzhou, and each time we relocated to another site due to investigation from the officials. Perhaps because I had to re-train new people each time, unlike the old troupe that had been with me for a few years where we had continuity in training and established relationships. Now this short-term mission model can only rehearse 2 to 3 times per year total of about one month. I have a resistance to this model and I do not think this implementation is practical. Therefore I do not have the strong drive and desire to do this evangelistic performing ministry. I thank God that He did not open the door this time. I understand God has a high standard for me to serve Him. Since I did not have a passion to do it this time, then I should not do it and God did not push me too. I am very grateful for this. He does not want me to just do ministry and rehearse just for performances. God values my pure motive to serve over my talent and gift. God really loves me and lets me witness His omniscience. Nothing in my thoughts and hearts can escape from His eyes. He also answered one of my prayers: "God, let me hear from You and understand Your leading.” This China trip helps me understand one thing, when God entrusts His children to accomplish His great ministry, He requires our commitment and passion; we cannot serve Him half-heartedly.
This time I did not go to China. I made some adjustments to shorten the trip and spent the whole time in Hong Kong staying with my mother. “Occupy Central” was still going on; I watched the news channel daily reporting on all of the occupied areas. The churches in Hong Kong had different views on this event. Some preachers and pastors preached from the pulpit that they should obey and submit to the authority and support the central government. Some vicinity churches in the occupied area opened their doors to serve tea, snacks and provided a rest place for demonstrators and students to show their support. Many residents in those areas complained about this event because it impacted their daily lives and brought inconvenience. Some shop owners were willing to sacrifice their inconvenience to support the students.Most older people thought that the students should focus on study instead of causing trouble. Some people said that the students were naïve and impractical and “Occupy Central” would not get any result. Some demonstrators followed the crowds and joined the event for fun. There were so many views on this, and none of us knew whether the students were doing something right or wrong. I was wondering why the majority of the demonstrators were young people. It is because the 50 years of unchanged policy after the Chinese government took over Hong Kong has a strong impact on this young generation. By the time the 50 years period is over, the elders and middle-aged people may no longer be there. Whoever is appointed by the Central Government to govern Hong Kong will not affect them.
I grew up in this colony and had no nationalistic root to either China or Britain. I see myself as a Chinese who has grown up in Hong Kong, and I view the people from Taiwan, Macau & mainland China as my people. I had enjoyed the benefits of freedom and prosperity of this city. People in Hong Kong really know how to make money and work and there is no strong political stand. Maybe Hong Kong will still continue its HK SAR benefits after China takes over and can remain a free port for investors. As I see this “Occupy Central” event, I can sense the spirit behind these students and a few middle-aged leaders. Although this event will not change anything at the end, at least they try to use peaceful demonstration to express their views. These young people put aside their schoolwork, time, rest and face opposition from their parents to hold firm on one belief, and hope to see a change. In the past, there have been many demonstrations, but they were never like this one in scale and persistence. This event likely will not change anything on the government's decision. Sooner or later, the demonstrators will return home and resume their normal lives as before. However, a few will pursue this conviction, perhaps continue to arrange more strategic action in the future ...
I think change starts from here, a conviction that will not be shaken by the circumstances. It will continue to pursue and withstand the test of time and opposition. William Wilberforce exhausted his lifetime on the abolition of slavery act after he converted to Christianity. Three days before his death; the British Parliament finally passed the abolition of slavery act that he fought for in his life time. It was after a long 20 years, with the support of his comrades who fought side by side with him, that their conviction finally was implemented.
A lot of the time, trying to change an entrenched problem is extremely difficult, and the result will not be visible overnight. The critical point is: Is that conviction correct? If an incorrect belief is firmly pursued and succeeds, it can be very dangerous and scary - Hitler was one typical example. Is our conviction in serving God correct? Do we serve Him wholeheartedly? Do we often examine if our heart is pure? When we serve, do we mix in personal glory and self-accomplishment? If your serving conviction is correct, and yet you cannot see any breakthrough, please do not give up, change starts from here --- a correct conviction, and live it out.
“Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”
(Psalm 139: 23-24)
Commemorations
Author: Philip, 11/9/2014 Morning
Today is Holy Communion Sunday; I am going to lead Praise and Worship. I have been preparing for this for more than 2 weeks. After I got to know the sermon topic I selected 4 songs that are responses to Christ’s love and I practiced with my other worship leader. I also wrote down what I was going to say, discussed with Ginny and then rewrote it this morning.
This morning I also listened to a BBC (British Broadcasting Company) program that was commemorating the 100th Anniversary of the beginning of the 1st World War, the 70th Anniversary of D-Day, and the 25th Anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall. It talked about why we commemorate past events and the dead.
Different countries, different people and different generations all commemorate important events and important people. But they commemorate in very different ways and for very different reasons.
Most countries remember other fallen soldiers. But the way and the emphasis may change with change in government. Most countries remember the bravery of the soldiers who died for their countries or their beliefs and encourage others to fight for freedom, justice or other ideologies. Of course, different governments would have different views of history and ideologies. Some countries commemorate other people that died. For example, the USA commemorates those who died on 911 and Israel commemorates the Jews that were slaughtered by Hitler. They mainly hope to make sure similar things would never happen again.
We commemorate the Lord’s Supper established by the Lord Himself. He told us to do this in remembrance of Him who gave His body and shed His blood for us. Different churches in different generations do this differently with different emphasis. But the most important point is how we respond to His love for us. Will we live for Him because of His love to us? Will we spread His Good News? Will we be one in Christ? Will we love one another as He has loved us? Will we love Him with all our heart, all our minds and all our strength? Will we love others as ourselves? Will we give ourselves for the Lord and for others? Will we love the church as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her? Will we obey His commands? The Lord said, “If you love me, you will obey my commands.” (John 4:15, 21, 23)
Today is Holy Communion Sunday; I am going to lead Praise and Worship. I have been preparing for this for more than 2 weeks. After I got to know the sermon topic I selected 4 songs that are responses to Christ’s love and I practiced with my other worship leader. I also wrote down what I was going to say, discussed with Ginny and then rewrote it this morning.
This morning I also listened to a BBC (British Broadcasting Company) program that was commemorating the 100th Anniversary of the beginning of the 1st World War, the 70th Anniversary of D-Day, and the 25th Anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall. It talked about why we commemorate past events and the dead.
Different countries, different people and different generations all commemorate important events and important people. But they commemorate in very different ways and for very different reasons.
Most countries remember other fallen soldiers. But the way and the emphasis may change with change in government. Most countries remember the bravery of the soldiers who died for their countries or their beliefs and encourage others to fight for freedom, justice or other ideologies. Of course, different governments would have different views of history and ideologies. Some countries commemorate other people that died. For example, the USA commemorates those who died on 911 and Israel commemorates the Jews that were slaughtered by Hitler. They mainly hope to make sure similar things would never happen again.
We commemorate the Lord’s Supper established by the Lord Himself. He told us to do this in remembrance of Him who gave His body and shed His blood for us. Different churches in different generations do this differently with different emphasis. But the most important point is how we respond to His love for us. Will we live for Him because of His love to us? Will we spread His Good News? Will we be one in Christ? Will we love one another as He has loved us? Will we love Him with all our heart, all our minds and all our strength? Will we love others as ourselves? Will we give ourselves for the Lord and for others? Will we love the church as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her? Will we obey His commands? The Lord said, “If you love me, you will obey my commands.” (John 4:15, 21, 23)
I have indeed seen the misery of my people
Author: Yikuen
It is late autumn and as I sat in my warm home looking at the scenery and colorful leaves from my window, I could not help but give thanks and praise to God for His grace poured on our residence since we moved to Boston.
Boston’s housing market is tense and the rental price is also overly high. The apartments are very old and small. Even before we moved to Boston, we had already noticed that. When Zhen Wei was searching on the Internet for a place for us, he looked at the pictures and compared the prices, "Wow, the value price ratio compared with Chicago is too low” he said as he shook his head and made a call to inquire for an apartment. The person who answered him was tough and said, “This is it, if you are interested, be quick.” While we both hesitated about this, the person called us back and told us that the apartment had been taken by others.
As Zhen Wei’s job transfer was quite fast and we were not familiar with Boston, we had no time and ability to check the actual apartment and compared We had no choice but to search the limited listings of apartments online. We rented what appeared to be a relatively satisfactory apartment in Melrose, a northern suburb of Boston. The surrounding area is beautiful and is close to the end of the Orange Line. Zhen Wei’s commute would take about 1 hour each way to work and the price was affordable in our budget.
However, after we had moved into our apartment for two weeks, we discovered that it was an “extreme apartment” had pollution everywhere. It is next to the curb on the main road, and there was a thick layer of dust on the table/floor every day. In the evening, the street lights beamed in our 2 west facing bedrooms just like the sunset. In the morning before 5, sound of vehicles and the smell of gasoline (we have a docking station next to our apartment building) woke us up for another hustling day to start. During the weekend, especially at night, many young people in Boston like car racing. They press the accelerator and turn up the car stereo loudly below our apartment, the cars roaring and continuously passing us one after another. We were stunned and our hearts pounded. Our ears suffered from the cars roaring constantly. My daughter Zhen Zhen was often awakened by the noise and cried non-stop at night. Our nights were tough. Also, having two bedrooms facing west on the top floor, we had a free sauna in our first 3 summer months in Boston.
We rented in an old 1920’s building. The corridor/apartment musty smell could not vent out and, mixed with the smell of smoke and sweat, often reminded us of the smell of a pigpen. This four-story building was bought by a Greek. In order to save money, he was not willing to renovate the building completely. He used cheapest workers and the cheapest materials. Pungent paint smells kept us from opening our eyes, and Zhen Zhen also developed a rash on her skin. The most terrible thing was having rats in our apartment. Some people said that Boston is a city on a mountain, and having rats in an old building is normal. Zhen Wei invented his own "peanut butter mousetrap" and captured four rats in our kitchen which frightened us. They had used rat poison in our house already. The so-called experts have repeatedly assured us that rat poison is absolutely harmless to people. But when I thought of the rats that had eaten the rat poison crawling on the same floor that Zhen Zhen was crawling (and that she sometimes put her small fingers into her mouth) I was horrified; I could only pray unceasingly and used alcohol to clean the floor over and over again to comfort myself.
When winter came, more problems arose. The heating system was the old style radiator. When the heat was on, it was so boiling hot that I worried Zhen Zhen might burn her hands. The landlord tried to save money and turn the heat on twice a day, once in the morning and once in the evening for 30 minutes each. When the heat was on, we felt like a baked potato in the oven, and needed to remove our clothing piece by piece. Before our sweat dried, we had to put our clothing back on piece by piece and were shivering in the cold. Zhen Zhen kept having a runny nose and finally she got sick. She had a fever for over three days with a serious flu.
That day Zhen Wei accompanied me to take Zhen Zhen to the doctor. After we left the hospital, I went home to cook; and he walked towards the Towne Estatesan, an apartment community near our apartment building. The condition is much better than our current apartment with a lower rental price. A Chinese colleague who lived there suggested to Zhen Wei to check it out. During the summer we had checked there but there was no vacant unit, and the property manager had told us to wait a year. This time Zhen Wei met another property manager. She had a successful cancer surgery six months ago, and then found out Zhen Wei worked in the same hospital where she was treated. She had an indescribably good impression of him. Zhen Wei was holding sick Zhen Zhen and briefly told her about our situation. She listened with sympathy and told him that she would contact him immediately if an apartment became available. She put us on the waiting list first. Zhen Wei had a glimpse of hope; however, seeing the long waiting list, he walked out the building with a heavy heart.
Zhen Wei was busy working every day. Seeing our situation, as the head of our family, he felt guilt and pain. I held Zhen Zhen and wiped my tears secretly. "Lord," I cried in my heart, but would not pray in words. I could only cry and sigh before God. I did not know how to face the long winter. My heart was worried but I could not do anything. I asked God to lift us out of this hardship, but dared not to have any hope.
Three weeks later, Towne Estates called us’ I picked up the phone and heard her say on the phone, “Incredible!” They had a vacant unit!!! An elderly couple that had lived in the community for 14 years needed to move out to an apartment with an elevator for a mobility problem. We could view the place next week and, if we were satisfied, we would sign a contract. After I hung up the phone, I could only cry. God’s rescue was so real to us.
After we checked out the apartment, we were very satisfied. All of our concerns were resolved and it was beyond our expectation. Frankly, it is rare to have such a large scale apartment community, with beautiful scenery, excellent management, and convenient transportation. The unit that we live in is one of the best in this community. We kept thanking the property manager that Zhen Wei met. God had moved her tender mercy and moved our name from the end of a long list to the top. She smiled mysteriously, and repeatedly said, "May God Bless you!"
We moved again in mid-November 2013. The next day after we moved in, Zhen Zhen’s runny nose that lasted a month stopped. But more amazingly, Zhen Zhenimmediately learned how to walk by herself on the new soft carpet. While Zhen Wei and I sat in our warm and quiet living room, enjoying the very beautiful scenery outdoor, we were touched by God’s grace again and again. “Yikuan,” Zhen Wei suddenly asked seriously, “Do you believe that if we had found this apartment when we first came to Boston, we may perhaps complain or find fault with it?” "Ah," I fully agreed with him from my heart.
In May of this year, I was surprised to see the previous tenant of my apartment. "Are you visiting friends?" I asked. "Oh, no, I moved back here," she told me, "Not long after I moved out, my husband died. I still like it here. I asked the property manger to help, and now I am back again.” While I was listening and comforting her, my heart could not help admiring our great God. He is the God that oversees everything. "For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to Him.” (II Chronicles 16:9)
Dear brothers and sisters in Grace Church, we left you more than a year ago. When we think of you, our hearts feel warmth and indebtedness to you all. We have received so much help and care from you, and before we could express our gratitude, we moved to Boston. Recently we attended a church baby shower. After we returned home, both Zhen Wei and I said in unison, "This reminds us of how much we owe the brothers and sisters of Grace Church. They were so nice to us that we feel unworthy to receive such love!! "
No matter where we are, we always remember your kindness and love in Christ in our hearts; you have encouraged us so much. No matter where we are, we are still walking together. May we experience more abundant grace and guidance of God in this coming New Year. If you have a chance to come to Boston, please come to visit us. Our address is: 145 Pleasant St, Apt C, Melrose, MA, 02176.
Count God's Blessings
Author: Laurie
In the twinkling of an eye, the end of the year is coming fast. Recalling the year in our home, our church, and our friends, every place is full of God's grace. God's love and power cannot be told by pen and paper.
For several years, plagued by ear problems, I was quite depressed and often did not want to participate in fellowship meetings. Even as I sat in Sunday school classes, I did not know what others said, and did not know when others finished praying. I was very unhappy and very upset.
So I talked about this in a prayer meeting. Thanks to God for hearing my prayer, and to the brothers and sisters who interceded for me. My family doctor introduced an ear doctor to me. The doctor said no surgery was necessary and I just needed a hearing aid. A prior doctor had recommended surgery, and I also asked Pastor Ho to see the doctor with me. But because I did not want surgery, the problem was unresolved until now.
During this process, God let me learn to be patient, and to pray without ceasing. Two months later the insurance company finally approved the coverage. After another two weeks, I finally put on the hearing aid and began to be able to hear the sermons and to talk with others. I am very thankful to God who always prepares the best things for us when we most need them.
Recently my younger sister also got a job in our company; it was a wonderful arrangement of God. In April she had lost her job. I asked about a job for her in my company, but they said she had to wait. Then a colleague suddenly quit. I immediately spoke to the boss and he immediately asked her to fill out the forms and get a physical examination, and so on. He asked her to come to work the next Monday. She has never believed in the Lord, but I hope that through this, she would be able to know this omniscient and omnipotent God.
In the twinkling of an eye, the end of the year is coming fast. Recalling the year in our home, our church, and our friends, every place is full of God's grace. God's love and power cannot be told by pen and paper.
For several years, plagued by ear problems, I was quite depressed and often did not want to participate in fellowship meetings. Even as I sat in Sunday school classes, I did not know what others said, and did not know when others finished praying. I was very unhappy and very upset.
So I talked about this in a prayer meeting. Thanks to God for hearing my prayer, and to the brothers and sisters who interceded for me. My family doctor introduced an ear doctor to me. The doctor said no surgery was necessary and I just needed a hearing aid. A prior doctor had recommended surgery, and I also asked Pastor Ho to see the doctor with me. But because I did not want surgery, the problem was unresolved until now.
During this process, God let me learn to be patient, and to pray without ceasing. Two months later the insurance company finally approved the coverage. After another two weeks, I finally put on the hearing aid and began to be able to hear the sermons and to talk with others. I am very thankful to God who always prepares the best things for us when we most need them.
Recently my younger sister also got a job in our company; it was a wonderful arrangement of God. In April she had lost her job. I asked about a job for her in my company, but they said she had to wait. Then a colleague suddenly quit. I immediately spoke to the boss and he immediately asked her to fill out the forms and get a physical examination, and so on. He asked her to come to work the next Monday. She has never believed in the Lord, but I hope that through this, she would be able to know this omniscient and omnipotent God.
"Treasures in Jars of Clay"
Author: Jane Ahn
(GCCC Mission Sunday, 10/5/2014)
2 Corinthians 4:7-9
7But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
My name is Jane Ahn and I am a Korean American PK (Pastor’s Kid) and MK (Missionary Kid) who grew up in China. Today, I wish to share with you a story of God’s faithfulness through pain and suffering.
In 1990, my family left our extended family on the East Coast for a foreign country that was still echoing with the aftermath of the Tiananmen Square Massacre. My brother Jason and I, being ages 2 and 4, remember little of the culture shock experienced by my parents. However, we do remember returning home from our days at the Chinese kindergarten singing at the top of our lungs – “没有共产党就没有新中国“ (If it were not for communism, there would be no Modern China.)
I am sure my mother was thinking, “What have we done? We came to share the gospel with brothers and sisters in China, but instead, our children have converted to communism!” These were also the times when old doubts began to emerge. She could remember the voices of anxious family members urging them, my parents, to leave the children behind, with them, so that we may have a chance at the American Dream. “You are robbing them of their future. What if they grow up to resent you? Do not be so backward…,” they would say. As I have now become a mother myself and think upon my own mother, I am deeply grateful that she has embedded into my heart God’s promise to us from Matt 6.
25-27 Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?...
31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
In many ways, it did seem like our family was swimming against the current, both by our own choice, but also at times through circumstances outside of our control. Ten years into our time in China, my mother gave birth to my younger brother Joseph, who turned out to have a developmental disability. Joseph was born with Down Syndrome. While being rolled into the C-section room at a hospital in Beijing, she was twice asked if she was sure she wanted to go through with the delivery, because if she changed her mind right now, it was not too late for an abortion. China’s One Child Policy has steadily eroded the value that we place on life and even today few people with disability are seen in public and many consider this to be a source of shame.
At the time, I felt confused as to why God would give our family a child that would be deemed a curse among many of our brothers and sisters. I did not consider it evangelistically strategic in helping us testify to the goodness of the Christian gospel. Many testimonies of Chinese believers consisted of healing narratives, so it was hard for me to fit this intellectually disabled child needing four different surgeries into a story of God’s blessing.
Things got much darker. Two years later, in April of 2002, when I was 17, my father passed away in a traffic accident in Beijing, leaving behind his ministry of twelve years, his seminary, his wife and now three children. Nothing could make us any lower and my heart grew bitter against God. I felt certain that He got it wrong. The timing could not be worse both for the family as well as the ministry. I fell into depression and began to have doubts about God’s good purpose for His children.
Surprisingly, the only source of comfort for me came through reading the book of Job. As you are well aware, Job is a man who has lost everything he owned and everyone he loved for no fault of his own. And in all his sorrow and venting, I saw a little of myself in Job. When God finally speaks, it is as if he says, “Okay, are you done talking? Now it’s my turn.” And as a mortal human, I too, like Job, was unable to withstand what came next.
Job 38:4.“Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me, if you understand. 5Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know!stretcheda measuring line across it? 6On what were its footings set,who laid its cornerstone 7while the morning stars sang togetherall the angels shouted for joy?”
Simply put, I am dust, and he is God. This began a series of change in me. Let me just say, it first put me in my proper place. It gave me new perspective. I came to recognize that as a Christian, I had lived with a sense of entitlement thinking that God owed me something for the things we did in His name. I had lived with the assumption that we had a contractual God, when in fact, we have a covenantal God. Christ has given me His life, therefore there is nothing in my life to which I can say “No” to Him, whether it is my father or any other person I had once considered “Mine.”
I also came to understand that our purpose as missionaries was not so much to dochurch planting and teach theological education as much as it is to live among our brothers and sisters and to demonstrate the power of the gospel in the midst of our suffering and grief.
We learned to be open and honest about our grief rather than to deny it, or act triumphant over it. Suffering has allowed us to gain a new perspective on our faith by helping us recognize how we are united to Christ in His suffering, and to declare that it is by His stripes that we are healed (Isaiah 53:5). There is nothing quite as powerful in our witnessing as boasting in our weakness that He is strong, and to admit, even when we don’t yet believe, that His grace is sufficient for us (2 Corinthians 12:9).
When I look back on this today, I can see how God has used a small and rather insignificant family like ours, nothing really but jars of clay, to start what is considered one of the largest underground seminaries in China that now serves over 1,200 house churches. Ironically, in God’s own timing, the seminary that my father began grew rapidly after his passing. Both his students and my family had come to realize that we cannot overly depend on one person but look to the Lord for His guidance and leadership. Furthermore, I never imagined how my brother Joseph who was born with Down Syndrome would open our eyes to actually see the weak and marginalized within the society. I’ve often come across physically handicapped and disabled individuals, but having a special needs brother has made me experience the grace of what they and their families go through daily. Just like how we loved and adored Joseph, we come to see an image of ourselves before God and how He bursts with uncontrollable love for us even despite our messiness and shortcomings. During our grief of the loss of my father, Joseph who was only 3 years old, became our biggest source of comfort and joy. Joseph was God’s precious gift to us in a time of our sorrow and he has taught us what it means to be fully dependent on the Lord, and to delight in my praise and worship unto God.
This April, Joseph was badly traumatized by being bullied and beaten in the school that he was attending in China. And although he has moved now to Chicago to live with my husband and me, this event has challenged many Christians and church leaders in China to recognize the need for ministries that continue to raise awareness for us to serve the weak and to love our neighbor. We pray that it would serve as a catalyst for growth in the Chinese church to see the precious value of life and the image of God that is within every individual.
Today, I am able to reflect a little more deeply when I think about pain and suffering. I am a little less quick to judge, or to blame, or to shake my fist at God. I am still learning what it means to trust in the Sovereignty of God but I pray that I will grow in my eyes of faith through such trials.
As I end my story, I wish to leave us with some questions:
As we think about ourselves and our families and spend time with our parents or children, how can we try to seek first His Kingdom, and sometimes even to the point of being willing to enter into suffering? How can we help each other steward our suffering to honor God and to serve others through our brokenness? I believe we need to hold hands with those that have walked before us, those that will walk behind us, and those that will walk beside us in this pilgrimage together.
As a closing, would you please read the following passage with me?
2 Corinthians 4:7-9
7But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
(GCCC Mission Sunday, 10/5/2014)
2 Corinthians 4:7-9
7But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
My name is Jane Ahn and I am a Korean American PK (Pastor’s Kid) and MK (Missionary Kid) who grew up in China. Today, I wish to share with you a story of God’s faithfulness through pain and suffering.
In 1990, my family left our extended family on the East Coast for a foreign country that was still echoing with the aftermath of the Tiananmen Square Massacre. My brother Jason and I, being ages 2 and 4, remember little of the culture shock experienced by my parents. However, we do remember returning home from our days at the Chinese kindergarten singing at the top of our lungs – “没有共产党就没有新中国“ (If it were not for communism, there would be no Modern China.)
I am sure my mother was thinking, “What have we done? We came to share the gospel with brothers and sisters in China, but instead, our children have converted to communism!” These were also the times when old doubts began to emerge. She could remember the voices of anxious family members urging them, my parents, to leave the children behind, with them, so that we may have a chance at the American Dream. “You are robbing them of their future. What if they grow up to resent you? Do not be so backward…,” they would say. As I have now become a mother myself and think upon my own mother, I am deeply grateful that she has embedded into my heart God’s promise to us from Matt 6.
25-27 Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?...
31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
In many ways, it did seem like our family was swimming against the current, both by our own choice, but also at times through circumstances outside of our control. Ten years into our time in China, my mother gave birth to my younger brother Joseph, who turned out to have a developmental disability. Joseph was born with Down Syndrome. While being rolled into the C-section room at a hospital in Beijing, she was twice asked if she was sure she wanted to go through with the delivery, because if she changed her mind right now, it was not too late for an abortion. China’s One Child Policy has steadily eroded the value that we place on life and even today few people with disability are seen in public and many consider this to be a source of shame.
At the time, I felt confused as to why God would give our family a child that would be deemed a curse among many of our brothers and sisters. I did not consider it evangelistically strategic in helping us testify to the goodness of the Christian gospel. Many testimonies of Chinese believers consisted of healing narratives, so it was hard for me to fit this intellectually disabled child needing four different surgeries into a story of God’s blessing.
Things got much darker. Two years later, in April of 2002, when I was 17, my father passed away in a traffic accident in Beijing, leaving behind his ministry of twelve years, his seminary, his wife and now three children. Nothing could make us any lower and my heart grew bitter against God. I felt certain that He got it wrong. The timing could not be worse both for the family as well as the ministry. I fell into depression and began to have doubts about God’s good purpose for His children.
Surprisingly, the only source of comfort for me came through reading the book of Job. As you are well aware, Job is a man who has lost everything he owned and everyone he loved for no fault of his own. And in all his sorrow and venting, I saw a little of myself in Job. When God finally speaks, it is as if he says, “Okay, are you done talking? Now it’s my turn.” And as a mortal human, I too, like Job, was unable to withstand what came next.
Job 38:4.“Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me, if you understand. 5Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know!stretcheda measuring line across it? 6On what were its footings set,who laid its cornerstone 7while the morning stars sang togetherall the angels shouted for joy?”
Simply put, I am dust, and he is God. This began a series of change in me. Let me just say, it first put me in my proper place. It gave me new perspective. I came to recognize that as a Christian, I had lived with a sense of entitlement thinking that God owed me something for the things we did in His name. I had lived with the assumption that we had a contractual God, when in fact, we have a covenantal God. Christ has given me His life, therefore there is nothing in my life to which I can say “No” to Him, whether it is my father or any other person I had once considered “Mine.”
I also came to understand that our purpose as missionaries was not so much to dochurch planting and teach theological education as much as it is to live among our brothers and sisters and to demonstrate the power of the gospel in the midst of our suffering and grief.
We learned to be open and honest about our grief rather than to deny it, or act triumphant over it. Suffering has allowed us to gain a new perspective on our faith by helping us recognize how we are united to Christ in His suffering, and to declare that it is by His stripes that we are healed (Isaiah 53:5). There is nothing quite as powerful in our witnessing as boasting in our weakness that He is strong, and to admit, even when we don’t yet believe, that His grace is sufficient for us (2 Corinthians 12:9).
When I look back on this today, I can see how God has used a small and rather insignificant family like ours, nothing really but jars of clay, to start what is considered one of the largest underground seminaries in China that now serves over 1,200 house churches. Ironically, in God’s own timing, the seminary that my father began grew rapidly after his passing. Both his students and my family had come to realize that we cannot overly depend on one person but look to the Lord for His guidance and leadership. Furthermore, I never imagined how my brother Joseph who was born with Down Syndrome would open our eyes to actually see the weak and marginalized within the society. I’ve often come across physically handicapped and disabled individuals, but having a special needs brother has made me experience the grace of what they and their families go through daily. Just like how we loved and adored Joseph, we come to see an image of ourselves before God and how He bursts with uncontrollable love for us even despite our messiness and shortcomings. During our grief of the loss of my father, Joseph who was only 3 years old, became our biggest source of comfort and joy. Joseph was God’s precious gift to us in a time of our sorrow and he has taught us what it means to be fully dependent on the Lord, and to delight in my praise and worship unto God.
This April, Joseph was badly traumatized by being bullied and beaten in the school that he was attending in China. And although he has moved now to Chicago to live with my husband and me, this event has challenged many Christians and church leaders in China to recognize the need for ministries that continue to raise awareness for us to serve the weak and to love our neighbor. We pray that it would serve as a catalyst for growth in the Chinese church to see the precious value of life and the image of God that is within every individual.
Today, I am able to reflect a little more deeply when I think about pain and suffering. I am a little less quick to judge, or to blame, or to shake my fist at God. I am still learning what it means to trust in the Sovereignty of God but I pray that I will grow in my eyes of faith through such trials.
As I end my story, I wish to leave us with some questions:
As we think about ourselves and our families and spend time with our parents or children, how can we try to seek first His Kingdom, and sometimes even to the point of being willing to enter into suffering? How can we help each other steward our suffering to honor God and to serve others through our brokenness? I believe we need to hold hands with those that have walked before us, those that will walk behind us, and those that will walk beside us in this pilgrimage together.
As a closing, would you please read the following passage with me?
2 Corinthians 4:7-9
7But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
Thanks to the Lord for His Daily Care
Author: Mrs. Hu
2014 was the year I got sick the most. Due to the degeneration of my spine with compression on my nerve, I had severe back pain that seriously affected my daily life, and it was really painful. I took a flight with this sickness from Chicago to Guangzhou. I was already very tired and my back pain intensified. I went to the hospital in Guangzhou to have an MRI, and the result showed that my lumbosacral joints and discs had different degrees of protrusion and bulging. I understood the seriousness, but what could I do? My doctor suggested surgery, but I chose conservative treatment.
Faced with this difficult hard-to-treat sickness, I prayed to the Lord every day with confidence, while my back pain caused me to be unable to stand or sit for a long time. I really hoped that the Lord would heal me. I really wanted to be with brothers and sisters like in the past, standing and singing praise hymns! I prayed, “In the Bible we know that You have healed so many people. Lord, I have given my life to you, would you please relieve my pain?” I had faith in my prayer.
With every passing day, I really felt much better and my back pain lessened. The doctor still gave me the same pills, so I knew the improvement was not from taking the pills. I knew the Lord was healing me and I gave the credit to the Lord.
When facing a chronic disease, first we need to have a good attitude. Doesn’t the Bible tell us a joyful heart is good medicine? The Bible also says, “Do not worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow has its own worries.” It is better to be poor and healthy than to be wealthy and sick. This shows that health is very important, and when you're sick, you must rely on the Lord.
Now that my health has been gradually restored, I am very happy. I will soon be back in the US to celebrate Christmas with brothers and sisters. Let us sing Joy to the World and other hymns to praise the Lord! May you all be healthy.
2014 was the year I got sick the most. Due to the degeneration of my spine with compression on my nerve, I had severe back pain that seriously affected my daily life, and it was really painful. I took a flight with this sickness from Chicago to Guangzhou. I was already very tired and my back pain intensified. I went to the hospital in Guangzhou to have an MRI, and the result showed that my lumbosacral joints and discs had different degrees of protrusion and bulging. I understood the seriousness, but what could I do? My doctor suggested surgery, but I chose conservative treatment.
Faced with this difficult hard-to-treat sickness, I prayed to the Lord every day with confidence, while my back pain caused me to be unable to stand or sit for a long time. I really hoped that the Lord would heal me. I really wanted to be with brothers and sisters like in the past, standing and singing praise hymns! I prayed, “In the Bible we know that You have healed so many people. Lord, I have given my life to you, would you please relieve my pain?” I had faith in my prayer.
With every passing day, I really felt much better and my back pain lessened. The doctor still gave me the same pills, so I knew the improvement was not from taking the pills. I knew the Lord was healing me and I gave the credit to the Lord.
When facing a chronic disease, first we need to have a good attitude. Doesn’t the Bible tell us a joyful heart is good medicine? The Bible also says, “Do not worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow has its own worries.” It is better to be poor and healthy than to be wealthy and sick. This shows that health is very important, and when you're sick, you must rely on the Lord.
Now that my health has been gradually restored, I am very happy. I will soon be back in the US to celebrate Christmas with brothers and sisters. Let us sing Joy to the World and other hymns to praise the Lord! May you all be healthy.